I made it back from my sister's house with my sanity in tact (no small feat). I am more than gently reminded why my sister and I get along better with several states between us :o) We did manage to get up to DC and have a nice dinner and walk around the Mall.
I started my new job at The Phone Company the day after I flew back from Virginia. It was actually really easy to get up and out on time seeings how I had become acclimated to waking up 6:30 Est. I love my new job. I know I'm still in training and it will be different once I get out on the floor. But I love working with people and feeling like I can choose where I want to go in the Company.
As I walked to my car the other day I stopped in mid sentence to my carpool buddy. we were talking about some theory or another and I stopped dead in my tracks for a moment. I had a brief moment (no longer than a few heart beats) where something was amazingly clear to me. I felt like someone who after a long sickness understands how grateful they are to be whole again. I realized that for the first time in 5 1/2 years I felt like the person that I truly was/am. The me that almost suffocated under the daily mind *bleep* and crap at The Insurance Company. The un-jaded, optimistic me that could hold a whole conversation without once mentioning my problems or work. I felt free!
"You going to open the door for me or what?" Michael shook me from my moment of clarity.
"I don't open the door for special people named Michael." I stuck my tongue out at him and hit the button on my remote. I've always been a smart alec.
Anyway, I feel amazingly good right now. I do miss Dendy in the quiet moments but hey, I'm entitled to a few moments of break up blues. And I'm still trying to get my second diploma out of The School From Hell (I certainly earned it). But MY life is finally here and accounted for and ready to be enjoyed. I no longer live to work. I work to LIVE :o) and it feels so Refreshing!
Living like me again,
~Z~
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