Life.....

I used to think that life was precious. I understood that it was a delicate thing that can be gone in any moment. I've attended funerals of the old and sometimes the very young. But today I was reminded just how precious and fleeting it is. Tonight I received a call from my best friend. I couldn't make out much that she was saying. All I could make out between the gut wrenching sobs I was hearing was "I need you.... Kaiser...Emergency Room." That was all I needed. I drove 100 the whole way and prayed that nothing was wrong. That this call was just something that would work itself out. Deep down inside I knew it was different. I knew something was seriously wrong.

I pulled in located the Emergency Room. I found my friend's cousin first. I asked what was wrong. He said, "Beth is dead. She's dead." I didn't believe him. I thought it was some sick joke he was playing. Then I saw AJ's dad and realized it was no joke. I finally managed to find AJ sitting on the tailgate of her dad's truck in the parking lot, her sister next to her crying through her drunken stooper, "I want my mom I want my mom." Tragedy finds us in all states and times of our lives inconvenient or not it just is.

I didn't know what to say or do. All I could do was hug people. Words were suddenly the most insignificant thing. They pulled out. I went back into the emergency room, for what I'm not sure. I wanted to say goodbye I guess. I made it to the entrance of the room and saw her feet from under the surgical drape and realized that I couldn't go further. I turned around. That was not the last image I wanted in my head of Beth.

Beth was a beautiful woman. She was full of life despite her chronic pain and back injury. She was always happy to see you when you came in. She always missed you when you were gone. Once you walked into her home you were one of her children. That's just the way she was. She was a person who loved and took care of people as much as she could even if it meant giving you the shirt off her back. She loved her crafts and her quilts. There was much thought and care that went into her gifts and her relationships. She loved her girls VERY much and her husband even more.

After leaving the hospital I drove to AJ's house. I called my own mother to let her know what was going on and to tell her that I loved her. I arrived at the house. There were people outside and inside. Family members and dear neighbors. It was hectic at first. I ended up in the living room sitting beside AJ hugging her, getting water and tissues, and sobbing right next to her. There was even a little bit of laughter. There were some get well balloons that were promptly popped and thrown away. I sat down for a second on a sofa and grabbed a blanket. Beth's favorite blanket....

I was very blessed to have met AJ and her Mother. She treated me as one of her own from the moment in my sophomore year of Highschool when AJ brought me home to hang out. She helped me laugh through my teenage years and helped me work through things that I wasn't comfortable discussing with my own mother. Beth always understood, never judged and was always there to talk, cry with, or just to hang out and watch a movie with. I spent many hours at her kitchen table or at her bedside talking and laughing and joking. I will miss her so very, very much.

I finally left to let AJ and her family have some space and to be honest, I needed some time to myself to process. I still wanted it to be a joke. I still expect her to be there the next time I call or come by to see AJ. The hardest part is going to be going back to daily life without her there. She was one of a kind work of love who shared herself with everyone around her. I love you Beth and I miss you.


~Z~

Alisha's Fundraiser

Hi all!

Today I woke up early... well early for me anyway ;o)... and went to Straw Hat Pizzeria to keep the Hulls company during their fundraiser for Alisha. For those of you that don't know, Alisha is a very special little girl. She was born with Camellia De Lange Syndrome (CDLS). CDLS is caused by a mutation in the genes. For Alisha this meant severe digestive tract issues. For the first several years of her life doctors were trying just to get enough nutrition to stay in her little body for her to grow and be healthy. They finally realized that she also has Celiacs disease which means that she cannot have gluten (aka: wheat). Alisha's Parents and Doctors worked hard and found a routine that worked for her to keep food in her wee body. Alisha is currently on a feeding tube and carries a small backpack around with her pump in it so that she can move around. Alisha has grown so much but really does not like wearing her backpack all day long or having her pump beep in the middle of her preschool class. Alisha is finally starting to eat a few grains of rice, some small crackers, and drink water. However she is a long way off from being able to eat enough to sustain her. Alisha was accepted into clinic in New Jersey that will provide treatments for her to help her learn to eat food. Please visit her blog and donate if you can.


So where was i.... Oh yes! The fundraiser! We stood outside and held signs for people to come in and buy pizza. Straw Hat pizza agreed to donate 50% of purchases to Alisha's treatments. Even Alisha was out there yelling "Pizza!! get your pizza!!" She also threw in the occassional "CAR WASH" which they will be having on Saturday.

Even her Uncle Jared got in on the sign waving! and for him that's quite a feat itself!So many people came out and showed their support for Alisha and her family! I was so impressed by just the random people who came up and donated what they could even above and beyond the pizza purchases. It was fantastic! Even Bri showed up to show her support! well... she was kinda of tired :o)


Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone that showed up and did what they could for Alisha. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!

Lots of hugs and love,

Zhetta

The worst part....

944....945...946.... Okay I think I have come to the conclusion that the worst part about being a photographer is not the fact that every person that knows you wants you to bring your camera to any function you ever attend. No, that is not the worst. The worst part is all the post production work that goes into organizing, sorting and gently tweaking the photos that you took during the day. Makes me wish I took fewer photos ;o) Well... maybe not because then I would only have one or two to choose from instead of six. I must admit though, I have improved a great deal about getting the SOOC (straight out of camera) shots so there's not as much editing. After I give the photos to the bride and groom I will post some before and after shots on here for all to see. But as of right now... I am going... to pass ou-....zzzzzzzzzzzzz..........

Today

Hi all! I think I'm going to skip the obligatory "I'm sorry i haven't blogged in months" apology. You all know me and know that, well, I get to things when I get to things. I've been enjoying life with my new storm and not ever having to log into my computer.

Recently, I have had enough offers for my side hobby for it to possibly be considered a business possibility. I've had back to back referrals for invitation design and if i must say so myself they are looking pretty smart.


I'm working on putting some on my site but I need a few releases signed first. Each design gets a little more creative. It was nice this time that I had a bride that wasn't on a super tight budget. Mind you my invitations are STILL cheaper than the going rate out there for custom designed invitations. But it's nice to have more than a $250 budget to print 600 invitations. I also have my second Wedding Job for photography coming up on Friday. I'm super nervous about screwing everything up. This is for my friend Ben and his lovely soon to be wife, Carrie. I keep having flashbacks to my friend Brian's wedding his crack photographer who was secretly in love with him and sabotaged his wedding photos. But the situation is not what theirs was and I am not that crazy you know who that was also my roommate. Ben & Carrie are two very relaxed people. I honestly think that even at my worst they would still like my photos as long as you could see all the people in them :o) but I am pretty good with a camera (so I'm told) and I am a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to my photography and even more so because I want their day to be perfect! So I have a feeling all will go well. Now if only I can put in an order for the wind to stop :o)

Other than my photography and design stuff my real job is going well. almost done with all my training and headed to my new supervisor. Should be interesting as she's already requiring a lot and with my affinity for not getting along with fellow females very well, it should make it even MORE interesting. But I'll just work hard and keep my head down. Works most times.

Life other than that is pretty much the same as it was this time last year. I do miss having Jeremy around. My mom found a Valentine's day card from him while I was moving and like any self respecting mom she read it :o) Don't worry it was PG ;o) She asked me how he could have changed his mind and just quit. I didn't really know what to tell her. I don't really know myself. He never did answer that question for me. But I find myself realizing that it doesn't matter too much. I've gotten over my obsessive need for closure from past relationships. I suppose all I need to know is that it wasn't working for him and that's enough to end a relationship. No need for "whys" or "what did I do wrong". Life works itself out. I have my awesome family and some terrific friends that help get me through.

Speaking of friends. We had Joe's birthday party at my house and I must say it was a lot of fun. I felt bad though because I didn't have much for the kids to do and I had to keep asking them to stop running around (i hate being a fuddy duddy). but other than that we had a good time with games, pirate themes, and the dart pistol i bought Joe....There were a few casualties ;o) Anyway, life has been good and fun :o) I hope all of you are doing well too! lots of hugs and loves!

Andrea